I find myself asking that often… who are you? What is your purpose? What are you doing here? I specifically find that I ask that question after having one too many glasses of wine with one too many pieces of cake! For those of you that have spent a significant amount of time with me, you will know I am rarely short on confidence. It does not mean I do not question my purpose more often than not.
As someone who is highly prone to anxiety, worry, and just plain overthinking, I wonder (out loud sometimes) why am I here? Sometimes I find it so hard to hear God’s calling or understand His plan. I find myself questioning every step I take, and every decision I have made. I start to spiral into this state of apprehension that I need to change everything I am doing because I am just not getting it right. During those times of “spiraling” I start to scream inside my head the following very astute observation…. “shut up, this life is not all about you!”
That internal realization does not always work to shut up the voices inside my head, but it does serve as slap in the face to just wake up. For me, most of my stress stems from thinking about myself. I keep thinking about what I need to be doing in this moment, and I forget that there are so many other people in this world. What do they need right now? Am I missing an opportunity to be light to someone else because I am focused too hard on being light to myself?
Being light does not necessarily mean you have to provide a solution to someone’s problem. It could simply mean be light… be positive… be peace… be a breath of fresh air that person may not have received before that moment.
In the featured picture, I had the opportunity to speak at an event with one of the most resilient, inspirational friends/speakers I have had the privilege of knowing. We were both flying into Nashville, and that morning I woke up with the most horrendous stomach bug. All I could think about was how to survive the flight! Needless to say when my friend asked if I wanted to go to dinner with her, my immediate thought was, “Of course not, can you not see I am in pain!! It is about me….” Before I could say no, I realized that this woman, my dear friend and colleague was being exactly what I was supposed to be for her… light.
She was my light, and she reminded me that sometimes, it is ok to just have a moment of light… peace… and at that moment laughter! We laughed for HOURS, and she gave me the gift of hope, of joy, of knowing that sometimes things suck especially if we only focus on ourselves. Without even knowing it, she challenged me to the same challenge I am giving each of you.. Just be something other than focused on yourself. Let your purpose be exactly that, an opportunity to provide more to those around you.
